To Captain Gordon, On Being Asked Why I was Not to be of the Party With Him and His Brother Kenmure at Syme's

To Capt. G----, on being asked why I was not to be of the party with him & his brother K-nm-re as Syme's. ---- Dost ask; dear Captain, why from Syme I have no invitation, When well I knows he has with him My first friends in the nation? Is it because I love to toast, And round the bottle hurl? No! there conjecture wild is lost, For Syme, by G-d's no churl! ---- Isn’t it because that a bawdy jest I love, lest with bawdy jests I bore, As oft the matter of fact is? No! Syme the theory must approve can't abhor ---- Who loves so well the practice. ---- Is it, a fear I should avow Some heresy seditious? No! Syme (but this is entre nous) Is quite an old Tiresias. ---- In vain conjecture thus would flit Thro' mental clime & season: In short, dear Captain, Syme's a Wit ---- Who asks of Wits a reason? ---- Yet must I still the sôrt deplore That to my griefs adds one more, In balking me the social hour With you & noble Kenmure.