Occasional Address, Spoken by Miss Fontenelle, on her Benefit-Night
Occasional Address ---- spoken by Miss Fontenelle on her
Benefit night. -----
Still anxious to secure your partial favor,
And not less anxious sure this night than ever,
A Prologue, Epilogue, or some such matter
Would vamp my bill, thought I, if nothing better; --
So sought a Poet{ roosted near the skies in his skyey dome,
Told him, that to admire him in admiration I was come;
I came to feast my curious eyes;
Said, nothing like his works was ever printed;
And last my prologue business slily hinted. --
"O Ma'am!" replied the silly, strutting creature
Screwing each self-important, awkward feature,
"Flatt'ry I hate, as I admire your taste,
"At once so just, correct, profound & chaste. ----
} Out
"{Ma'am
But let me tell you," quoth my Man of rhymes,
I know your bent ---- these are no laughing times; --
"Can you, but Miss, I own I have my fears,
"Dissolve in Pause, & sentimental tears;
"With laden sighs, & solemn-rounded sentence,
"Rouse from his sluggish slumbers, fell Repentance;
"Paint Vengeance as he takes his horrid stand,
"Waving on high the desolating brand,
"Calling the storms, to bear him o'er a guilty Land!"
Benefit night. -----
Still anxious to secure your partial favor,
And not less anxious sure this night than ever,
A Prologue, Epilogue, or some such matter
Would vamp my bill, thought I, if nothing better; --
So sought a Poet{ roosted near the skies in his skyey dome,
Told him, that to admire him in admiration I was come;
I came to feast my curious eyes;
Said, nothing like his works was ever printed;
And last my prologue business slily hinted. --
"O Ma'am!" replied the silly, strutting creature
Screwing each self-important, awkward feature,
"Flatt'ry I hate, as I admire your taste,
"At once so just, correct, profound & chaste. ----
} Out
"{Ma'am
But let me tell you," quoth my Man of rhymes,
I know your bent ---- these are no laughing times; --
"Can you, but Miss, I own I have my fears,
"Dissolve in Pause, & sentimental tears;
"With laden sighs, & solemn-rounded sentence,
"Rouse from his sluggish slumbers, fell Repentance;
"Paint Vengeance as he takes his horrid stand,
"Waving on high the desolating brand,
"Calling the storms, to bear him o'er a guilty Land!"
I could no more ---- askance the creature eyeing,
D'ye think, said I, this face was made for crying?
I'll laugh, that's poz -- nay more, the world shall know it;
And so, your servant; gloomy Master Poet!
Firm as my creed, Sirs,
Believe me, Gentles, 'tis my fix'd belief,
That Misery's another word for Grief:
I also think, so come my soul to bliss!
That so much laughter, so much life happiness. ----
Thou Man of Care, whose task is, to contrive
To make three guineas do the work of five;
Laugh in Misfortune's face --- the beldam witch!
Say, you'll be happy merry, tho' you can't be rich. ----
Thou other Man of Care, the wretch in love,
Who long with jiltish arts & airs hast strove;
Who, as the boughs all temptingly project,
Measur'st, in desp'rate thought -- a rope -- thy neck --
Or where the butling cliffs o'erhangs the deep
Peerest, to meditate the healing leap ----
For shame! For shame! I tell thee, thou art no man:
This for a silly giddy, vain, capricious woman!
A creature ---- tho' I say't, you know, that should not
Ridiculous with her idiot, "Would, & Would not": --
D'ye think, said I, this face was made for crying?
I'll laugh, that's poz -- nay more, the world shall know it;
And so, your servant; gloomy Master Poet!
Firm as my creed, Sirs,
Believe me, Gentles, 'tis my fix'd belief,
That Misery's another word for Grief:
I also think, so come my soul to bliss!
That so much laughter, so much life happiness. ----
Thou Man of Care, whose task is, to contrive
To make three guineas do the work of five;
Laugh in Misfortune's face --- the beldam witch!
Say, you'll be happy merry, tho' you can't be rich. ----
Thou other Man of Care, the wretch in love,
Who long with jiltish arts & airs hast strove;
Who, as the boughs all temptingly project,
Measur'st, in desp'rate thought -- a rope -- thy neck --
Or where the butling cliffs o'erhangs the deep
Peerest, to meditate the healing leap ----
For shame! For shame! I tell thee, thou art no man:
This for a silly giddy, vain, capricious woman!
A creature ---- tho' I say't, you know, that should not
Ridiculous with her idiot, "Would, & Would not": --
Laugh at her airs -- these frowns no more terrific;
And, love another a kinder -- that's your grand specific. ----
To sum up all, be Merry! I advise:
And as we're merry --may we still be wise!
---------------------------
Thou man of crazy care that inly pines & ceaseless sigh,
Still under bleak Misfortune's blasting eye;
Doom'd to that sorest task of man alive --
To make three guineas do the work of five;
Laugh in &c. ----
Wouldst thou be cur'd, thou silly, moping elf?
Laugh at her follies; laugh e'en at thyself;:
Learn to despise these frowns, now so terrific;
And love &c ----
And, love another a kinder -- that's your grand specific. ----
To sum up all, be Merry! I advise:
And as we're merry --may we still be wise!
---------------------------
Thou man of crazy care that inly pines & ceaseless sigh,
Still under bleak Misfortune's blasting eye;
Doom'd to that sorest task of man alive --
To make three guineas do the work of five;
Laugh in &c. ----
Wouldst thou be cur'd, thou silly, moping elf?
Laugh at her follies; laugh e'en at thyself;:
Learn to despise these frowns, now so terrific;
And love &c ----
Key details
- Archive number
- NTS/02/25/BRN/02/83
- Alt. number
- 3.6240
- On display
- No
- Creator
- Burns, Robert (Author)
- Archive number
- NTS/02/25/BRN/02/83
- Alt. number
- 3.6240
- On display
- No
- Creator
- Burns, Robert (Author)
Description
Occasional Address, Spoken by Miss Fontenelle, on her Benefit-Night.
Spoken by Miss Fontenelle at Dumfries Theatre on December 4th 1793. This version of the manuscript contains 13 unpublished and alternative lines, together with an autograph letter from the recipient.
Archive information
Themes
Hierarchy
-
Robert Burns, collection of poems and songs
(
a sub-fonds is a subdivision in the archival material)
- Occasional Address, Spoken by Miss Fontenelle, on her Benefit-Night